Been a week since I contacted the school. The office assistant sent me an email to let me know that she passed my email on to the admissions adviser. I haven't heard anything since then. I would like to start getting this thing going. I still need to deal with the application and paying the non-refundable fee. Then I need to apply for financial assistance to pay for it all. I know that I can get loans and grants. I was able to get them when I was working, I should be able to get them when I'm not. I just want to get things moving so that I know where I am. So that IF I get a job, I can let them know that I will be in school starting the new term. I figure I would go through and get the medical office stuff (coding, billing, reimbursement, and customer care). That way I can apply to (and possibly work at) any healthcare facility. And since my ultimate goal is to move to Montana, I could apply to just about any hospital/clinic/dental/nursing home facility in the state. I am also thinking about adding just a few bookkeeping classes in there to round everything out. If my credits transfer I should already have a Office Assistant certification. If they don't, it wouldn't take much to get one. Then I would have certifications in Office Assistant, Medical Billing/Coding/Reimbursement, Medical Customer Service, and Small Business Accounting. So I would be able to work in just about any office setting.

All I know is that as soon as I get my first paycheck, from whatever job I happen to get, I will have to have someone take me to town, so that I can open a new account under just my name. That way I can hide some money from Thor. He has the issue that money burns a hole in his pocket. And I want to be able to move out of here as soon as possible. If I get a job in town, I should be able to just walk to a bank to open up an account. The issue is doing it while he isn't the one picking me up. I would then have to change my direct deposit so that only the money needed to pay our monthly bills and help with food/gas is deposited into the joint account. Then once I have enough saved up, I should be able to move. I know that is it selfish, but I hope it works out that I get a job (soon) then start school in the fall. While being able to stay here while I save up the money to move to a different state, and to pay for filing for divorce. I have the official marriage certificate now, so I have proof that the marriage took place. I even have someone who is willing to use her contacts and get me a lawyer for either pro-Bono or reduced fees. As long as I make more than $600 a month, I would be able to pay for all the bills, gas in the car, giving Mom and Dad money for help with monthly utilities, and money to move with. The sad thing about that.... I am wanting a job that pays me the equivalent to what most people pay for monthly installments on their car or apartment. Even Velvet's psych doctor stated that ONE of her car payments is more than what we make in a month. And she has two car payments and a house payment, along with monthly utilities. I suppose your wondering how much we make.... well after child support takes their portion, Thor brings home $31 a week in unemployment. That's it... that's all we make. $124 a month. Now, it makes sense that I would be happy with a job that only pays $600 a month. Obviously I would want to make more than that, so that I know that I can afford a place of my own, with my daughter, along with all the monthly bills/necessities. And since I plan on doing this without Thor, I would need to be able to do it on my own. I know I can do it... I did it with no help from him for some time before he got hired at the phone company (before we moved to Mnpls.) I did it after we came back for the time that I was at the gas station. And we were smokers at that time. Now we aren't so that is one less "necessity" to pay for. If I get a job like I had a Kwik Trip, I would be able to make it. To bad they won't hire me back. Tried that, didn't work. SO... school is my best option. Whether he wants me to or not. As long as he doesn't know about the loans that I will most likely get, he won't throw a fit. If the classes work out the way I think they will, I should have all my certifications in about 18 months (starting in the fall). But I should have some money left over for living expenses from the grants and loans for living expenses. I hope.... GODS, I hope it works. I need it to work. I can't keep going like this. I want to stand on my own two feet. I want to be able to offer safe place to ALL my kids when they need it. I want to be able to move out ON MY OWN and know that I will be alright. I want to be able to leave this relationship and begin to feel secure in my own skin again.

Well that, I think, is it for now.... might be more later.